Meet Sir Woofington
My Dear Furry Friends,
It is with great pleasure — and a most distinguished tail wag — that I welcome you to my humble blog space. You have warmed the cockles of my heart by venturing into my lair, and it is, indeed, my good fortune to meet you.
On this serendipitous occasion, I feel compelled to assure you my intentions are wholly honorable — to amuse you, to offer thoughts worthy of your contemplation, and to delight your noble hearts as you journey through my future posts.
But first, a certain matter of concern weighs heavily on my canine mind. At the onset of our acquaintance, please take a glance at a few important words…
As the fabled dog blogger you have no doubt heard whispered about in the more distinguished corners of the canine world, I am keenly aware of your natural desire to lick my face upon meeting me. However, that would hardly be considered dignified.
A simple, respectful paw-shake will do nicely.
Allow me also to state — in the clearest, most courteous terms — that while I am a dog of distinction, this is not due merely to lineage or breeding. Rather, it is reputation alone — for exhibiting impeccable manners — that has secured my standing.
Thus, I must stress that common gestures, such as the indiscriminate sniffing of hindquarters (whether canine or human), are most certainly beneath me. Nicknames require particular caution: Please refrain from addressing me as "Woofie." My name is — and shall remain — Sir Woofington, if you please.
Now that we have properly clarified the importance of etiquette, mutual respect, and a pleasant coexistence, permit me to lead you in the Official Oath of our noble pack.
Kindly raise your paw and recite after me:
“Every good dog deserves a belly rub. Woof! Woof! Woof!”
Welcome, dear friends. You are now part of something splendid.
Yours in Loyal Service,
